I am happy to say, after my youngest son, 15 years old, and I had a long disagreement on monday evening, he has improved in his morning routine, drastically! What a relief, at least for now...lol! He has been read
y to walk out the door on time in the morning. He has actually began moving faster. Yesterday, when I arrived at the school to pick him up, I arrived 10 mins early. Low and behold, there he was! WOW! We have been tug-o-warring over this issue, of him being out and in on time, for a very, very long time!
y to walk out the door on time in the morning. He has actually began moving faster. Yesterday, when I arrived at the school to pick him up, I arrived 10 mins early. Low and behold, there he was! WOW! We have been tug-o-warring over this issue, of him being out and in on time, for a very, very long time! Yes, I praised him over and over again. I told him how proud I was of him too! He said he likes it when I "talk" to him rather than become so angry and "yell" at him....lol!
He said, what helped him was when I asked him, "What do you need to be on time?" Although I did not ask that question from the perspective of my last blog entry, apparently, his interpretation was different. I was asking what he needed in terms of gathering his track equipment, notebooks, backpack, clothes ironed and layed out, etc. so that he can have minimal things to do in the morning or even after school, to be on time.
His answer was, "I need you to help me." I actually became kinda sad when I looked into his eyes. He was on the verge of crying from frustration. Yes, this calmed me down. I asked, "What do you want Mom to do?" He said, "Help be figure it out, figure out why I'm not getting it." By this time, the cry was in his voice, his eyes were teary and red.
By the end of the conversation, we came up with writing down things he needs to remember and having him come home in his track clothes to save time (I have to pick him up inbetween parents coming to pick up their kids. I only have a short window of time). We also thought about buying him a watch, rather than him using his cell phone, so he can keep better track of the time when he is on the track field.
So far, the past few days have been really changed...:-D. Communication is awesome!
2 comments:
Oh, that is so sad about your son. I bet you felt his frustration. I suppose we often forget that kids need help to learn what we often take for granted. I think no matter how many kids you have each one has their own issues to work through.
My son and I work together like that. He gets out his diary at night and goes through what he has to take to school. He just hates being pressured in the morning to pack things.
I don't recall what I did as a child to get ready for anything.
As a child, I recall having to polish our white oxfords every night. We were required to get our clothes out the night before and we took our baths the night before.
I do believe boys are so different from girls in the way they think. Lately, he has been doing really, really well. I do take the time to tell him :-D. I think they need to hear positive things too..
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