Saturday, February 6, 2010


I drove an hour to San Diego last night after the daycare closed at 7:00pm. It rained alot and very hard. I felt quite anxious to get to my cousin. Since he has had his stroke a week and a half ago, he has been having a series of seizures. Doctor says, this is normal when the brain has been traumatize by a stroke.

I am the closest relative to him and I am an hour away. He has been refusing to eat because his family is not around him. So, he asked the doctor to call me. He sounded quite groggie but I explained to him I would be down to see him that night. I felt anxious all day long as I waited for the daycare to close so I could leave.

Once arriving, he did not look like himself at all. He did not have his teeth in his mouth and he had not shaved. In all my childhood and adulthood, I have never seen him this way. At first, it frightened me. Then I put it into perspective.

The nurse was in the process of giving him his medications, which he was not cooperating. I asked her if I can do it. I was firm with him and he did take them. Often, I don't think nurses are caring enough. They tend to be overworked with many patience and don't have the time to be nurturing. This made me feel worse because I am so far away and unable to get to him like I'd like to. He is also refusing to eat.

I just spoke to the nurse today. I had a few complaints as to how they are doing things with him. It seems very 20 mins they are waking him up to check temperature, urine, give meds, etc. They pull the blankets off of him. They flip on those bright lights in his face. It seems to me they can do all those things at once and be done so he can go to sleep. I arrived about 8:40pm. They kept coming in there, at different intervals, until I left at 10:20pm! Then they get him up early in the morning for physical therapy and he is still groggie. He has not truly slept since he's been in there. In addition, they give him something to make him sleep and he is unable to sleep it off after being interrupted every 20 mins!

So, when I spoke with the nurse today, I let her know, I want the doctor to call me back as soon as he can and I want to be included in the meeting they are having on monday via conference call. The nurse asked me if I put in a complaint to the head nurse. I did not know about all that. This is my first time having to be the decision maker of a family member. When my mom died, my aunt did it.

I will wait to talk to the doctor. In the meantime, I will try to calm my anger. I am really upset. I'm sure it is because it is the fear of the possibility of the end if it is not handled correctly. I have to get my perspective back in focus.

Happy thoughts and prayers....lots!