Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Prom Results

Everything was lined up and ready to go until we found out the place where a friend of ours was going to get the limo for free had gone out of business. Yes, bummer! However, we went on to plan B which was for my son to drive my car. I wasn't totally ok with this because, though he is a good driver, the prom was about an hour away. I told him if he follows a friend that I trust and that I have a talk with, I might consider it. He did find a friend who would be driving, that I knew and that I trusted, a female friend. I know both her and her date. When I spoke with her, she assured me she would drive carefully, that she understood how difficult it is to follow another driver and that she was familiar with the freeways in that area. So this was the plan. All together, there were 4 couples.

Saturday morning, the day of the prom, we went to get his hair trimmed and pick up the flowers. Those trips went very well. As soon as we pull into the driveway at about 2:40pm (the kids were to meet at the school at 3:30), the car...yes the one he was supposed to drive to the prom, began to overheat! At this point, I was going to take the car down the street to get detail while he got dressed. I called my mechanic immediately. I already knew the car wouldn't be ready in time. He said to let it cool for 20 mins., add some water and bring it over. In the meantime, we called rental car places which didn't work because he had to be 25 years old to be a legal driver, otherwise they charge an extra $27 per day. While I was on the phone with the rental car places, my son was on his cell calling friends to see if he could get a ride for himself and his date, which was a success.

We got the car to the mechanic and ended up leaving it there. He said it needed a bypass until I would be able to get the heat core fixed. Apparently, the fans weren't working and the heat core cracked, yes $450!! The bypass was fine for me at $60. When winter comes, hopefully I can get it fixed then. He said it is not uncommon for this to happen when the car has been sitting for a year and 7 months like mine did.

Anyway, we get to the school. The family was all there in support of him, as usual. This was really nice to see, but everyone depends on me to keep the system rolling'....keep that thought in mind. The couples are arriving one by one and getting the couples pictures taken in the gym. Everyone was done except for the driver and her date. He came first, very late and she came about 15 mins. after him. When they got there, they were so aloof!!

He arrived in his sneakers and proceeded to polish his dress shoes while he talked on the cell phone. When she finally arrived, she began talking to her friends about their outfits and where she had seen some of the accessories, etc. I'm quite tired as this point but maintained my happy face for the occasion. However, I felt they were not thinking about what was going on. The family all began looking my way. The photographer, a dear friend and the father of the young man who was going to do the limo for us, said "Everyone is getting antsy, maybe you should try to talk to her."

I approach her as she and her date are standing there, facing each other, him on the cell phone, looking at their flowers still in the closed, clear box. (At this time, there's no one in line for the pictures). I say to them, "Why are you looking at the flowers that way?" She says, "I don't know how to put them on and he's on the phone!" in almost a comical way. So, I took the initiative to put the flowers on them. Hers was just an elastic band for her wrist. She didn't know how to pin his to his lapel so I put it on him, but she insisted she wanted to do it herself, so we took it off and I helped her to do it. By now, the line for the pictures is quite long.

After their pictures had finally been taken, I began to rush all of them because time was really late by now. It was 5:20 or so when they got done. Their dinner reservations were at 5:30 pm and they still had to get there, some 20 mins away.

As we come out of the gym, I'm thinking, "Ok, they can load up the cars and get going." To my surprise, they forgot about the group pictures!! Yes, we had to set up and take more pictures; boys with the girls as a group, boys group and girls group. They did not get done until almost 6 pm!!! Finally, I said, "Ok, this is the last picture! You all have to get out of here!" So, off they went. Later in the evening, my son sent me a text letting me know that dinner went very well and they had a nice time :)....what a relief.

Later, he text me again, telling me that the girl (on the far right in the white dress) had taken the freeway in the wrong direction and they did not arrive to the prom until 10 pm. The prom was over at 11 pm. I was extremely disappointed for him. I encouraged him to have a good time with what time he had left and not to dwell on the late issue.

While at the prom, in this short little hour, his ex girlfriend asked him to dance and he said "Not now, maybe later." He wanted to respect his date. (Quick background: They broke up last year and this young lady just won't let go. She assumed he would ask her to go to the prom and she had planned a surprise for him. When she found out he had to intentions of going with her, she became really emotional and upset). As she walked away, she pushed him with her shoulder as she passed by. His friends said, earlier while at the prom, she had been acting out. After texting me, he moved on from that occurrence.

His best friend was there with her fiance'...there are issues behind this one too, but we won't go there. She wanted my son to meet the fiance'. I don't know what she told her fiance' about my son, but the fiance' was ready to fight! The girl had to make him leave early because her fiance' was that upset! All my children are gentle people. I did not raise them to fight like that. Sure, defend yourself, but not fight for the sake of fighting.

After the prom was over, they went to the beach and hung out for a while. He was home shortly after 2:00 am. Overall, he was glad he went, but extremely surprised by the situation with the two girls.

If you made it through this long blog, thanks for reading it! ....Presious

5 comments:

Elise said...

Pics look great!

Poor girl... (the ex) it looks like she still holds a flame for him.

What's the situation with his friend and fiance? Aren't they a little young? xx

Merisi said...

The lives of young people can be so complicated and difficult to navigate. Congratulations on having brought up such a fine young man! :-)

lori vliegen said...

hi presious! what a great looking couple! your son sounds like such a super guy...i don't know too many of them who would take the time to text their mom during the prom! it sounds like you have a great relationship with him! :)

presious said...

Elise,

They started out as friends and she was quite a piece of work then. I warned him about her because of her behavior. She slowly developed a romantic interest in him. I did not approve and would not allow it because of her behavior of acting out childishly, extremely so.

As a result of my disapproval, she wanted to apologize to me for her behavior in that I would not allow her to perform her acts in anyway towards my son. I met with her mother and we had a long talk with the two of them present. Yes, we discussed her behavior and her attitude. All was well, until they broke up. He said he she tends to be too controlling.

Now he tells me, "Mom I should have listened when you tried to tell me."

As for the fiance, I have no idea. My son had never met him or put eyes on him until that night. Sounds like the guy is just insecure with himself. My son and the girl have been friends for years, never anything romantic.

As for her being so young, I believe she has abandonment issues surrounding her father. Now she's looking for love in all the wrong places.

Merisi,

Good point, which is why I met with her mother. I explained to all of them, and her mother agreed, that they have no idea what a "relationship" is about. The set up was for them to "go places" as "friends" with other friends.

Thank you for the compliment. He is the 3rd child and 2nd boy (1 girl and 3 boys).

Lori,

LOL! Everyone of my kids are like that! When something is not right, in the moment, they either call or text "mom". Raising children is not an easy task. You have to talk to them a LOT and EXPLAIN OVER AND OVER AND OVER...LOL! They may not recieve it in that moment, but it will come back to them.

Next to my relationship with God, are my children. I love them and appreciate them extremely. I take nothing for granted. I'm no better than any other parent out there! :)

Polly said...

pres - Im sorry I haven't been to your blog in a while - poor Ollie has been sick - but I just wanted to tell you what a handsome son you have.

Be back soon.